Tag Archive 'self image'

Nov 20 2008

Profile Image of Pamela Skuse
Pamela Skuse

Sabotage Self-Worth — A Deeper Perspective on Love Your Neighbour Like Yourself Part 1

Filed under Life, Love

The majority of individuals refuse to acknowledge that they do need to improve their self-worth, self-esteem, self-image and self-respect not to even think of the expanded concepts of loving, accepting, blessing, acknowledging and honouring themselves.

Developing self-worth and self-love is not just for those with poverty or victim consciousness. Every single human being has a need to improve self-love, self-responsibility and self-empowerment, otherwise there would be no problems in the world — there would be no victims and there would be no perpetrators , there would be no suffering, hardship, punishment and struggling with ‘just enough to survive’. Because one may appear to look good on the outside, or if one may have material wealth, if one has a good job with ample income, if one can speak proudly or if one has egotistically embarrassing experiences there is still a need to honour and love the self to the state of where you have total unconditional love, total acceptance of all things, total compassion, ‘know-no-agenda’ and have complete respect and honour for everything and everyone.

Have you ever heard of the phrase “Love your neighbour like yourself”!

Does this create a contradiction deep within you? Do you think that there is a deeper meaning to this phrase? If you allow yourself to wander for a moment, can you see with clarity beyond this concepts, to the true meaning, the energy structure — to see beyond the present understanding of this commandment?

Look at the conflicts and wars within the mass consciousness world and then look at your own experiences. Can you see how each individual person in your environment perceives, belittles and judges others, with very little care and attention? Can you see that same quality in how they treat themselves? They act and react with that same behaviour. Do you realize that they are one and the same? Humanity cannot live the principle of ‘love thy neighbour like thyself’ within their community. Society’s conditioning, facades, benchmarks and dogmas behold this concept and make the outer world think that, as adults, they are treating their neighbour with love and kindness - truly they are not!

Beneath the surface, what are your feelings, your thoughts, beliefs and judgments about your neighbour, family, or the other cultures around the world? Is there prejudice or are you putting on a false front, a façade? What role models do you teach your children to adapt and to adopt as their own?

Can you see that within each individual, and even within yourself - there is a part that belittles and abuses yourself? This part does not accept some aspect of the self in some way - whether it is emotionally, physically or spiritually. Do you see that individuals blame everything else outside of the self for their issues and misfortune? Does that apply to you also? It is another’s fault for the experiences that you are having? Do you see that nearly every person seeks advice and validation to something or another outside of self — that something or someone else is smarter, grander, more skilled and superior to them, therefore stating that they are indeed inferior and untrusting to search for their own answers? Do you also?

Can you begin to question this perception, looking at the energy structure - beyond a logical mind?

To treat a neighbour or any other person with unconditional love, compassion, respect, care and kindness, you first have to treat yourself with love, compassion, respect, care and kindness. You must be the full vessel. Then, the inner loving energy vibrations can be projected out through your behavioural patterns and through your actions. Your consciousness projects out the loving energy quality or the unloving trait way beyond a façade. It will be returned to you, as you will receive what you give out - even if you are not aware of your inner feelings and beliefs.

Energy is reflected from the inner to the outer. You must have that quality within you - in your core belief structure - to attract and experience that quality in your outer reality. You are what you think, feel and believe in. You are how you see yourself - which is reflected in your body and in your experiences! If you feel unworthy, unloved or picked on, being a victim of society’s frustrations, you have to look at yourself. If you become a victim of fate or circumstances, it is your responsibility, for you are unconsciously attracting that quality to you! Your abuser is mirroring an aspect of you of how you see and treat yourself, deep at your unconscious level.

Two Steps to Observe

1. Firstly, you must accept the responsibility for your own actions for they are your creations. 2. Secondly, through observing your thoughts, feelings and experiences, and through observing the building-creating processes and the destructive-destroying processes within you, you will see how your belief system - your inner energy structure is formed.

How can you love your neighbour if you don’t love yourself first? And how can you love yourself, if you criticises, belittle, condemn, disrespect, abuse, self-destruct, self-indulge and judge yourself? If you indulge in attachments, obsessions and addictions, habits or bad moody behaviours, how can you accept, respect and love another? If you do not like what you do, or what you look like or who you are, or if you have an agenda of how life should be - how can you do otherwise for another?

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Mar 24 2008

Profile Image of Sheri Falcone
Sheri Falcone

Practice Positive Self Talk and Affirmations

Filed under Positive Affirmations

Practicing self talk means giving purpose to your positive reinforcement, motivation and recognition. This is the same talk you would give a friend so be kind and give it to yourself. Congratulate yourself when you have a success and remember all your abilities, accomplishments, strengths and skills. I suggest you make yourself an accomplishment board or journal and record all your successes — both small and large. Review your progress periodically and acknowledge where you have gone and keep an eye on where you are still going.

Use your self talk as a tool for success. Make it work for you. What you repeatedly say to yourself has a profound impact on your self worth and performance as well as eventual successes. Remember that your subconscious records all your thoughts and triggers physiological responses to match the images and thoughts you have of yourself. Make this work for you by keeping your self talk positive and reinforcing it with positive affirmations. For example, I did a great job on the research project my boss asked me to do. The research gave him the valuable information he needed to make an informed decision. I enjoyed doing this research and look forward to being asked again. My work is done in a professional manner and informative and complete.

As well as keeping your thoughts positive, it is imperative that you stop the negative chatter. Your mind records the negative chatter as easily as it does the positive talk. Your subconscious believes your negative chatter when it is repeated in your mind over and over. If you catch yourself using negative chatter, stop and rephrase what you said in a positive manner. Eliminate the negative words. Focus on using positive terms and affirmations.

Make your positive self talk and communications an everyday habit. A habit is created if you do something 21 days in a row. It is truly a very short time to focus and create a habit of ensuring positive self image. Try making small changes in your vocabulary. Substitute the phrase “I will try” with “I will”, or “I should do” with “I will do”. Try saying “I want or desire to” or “I choose to” instead of “I must”. “I can” instead of “I can’t”. Just the shift in some of our common terminology makes a huge difference in our subconscious and self image. Watch what you say during the day and see how many words that you say have a negative connotation to them. Learn how you can rephrase those statements as you acknowledge them.

Focus your positive thoughts with affirmation statements. These are the reminders that will help you achieve your goals and success. They are the positive mental sticky notes that will motive your mind to work for you instead of against you.

Here are a few tips on how to use the powerful affirmation tools as mental reminders. * Use personal statements. Use “I” or your own name. * Keep your statement short, sweet and to the point. * Phrase your statements in a positive way. Remember the mind accepts the truth as it is worded. Use only positive words — leave out the negatives. I.e. I will not be late for work today vs. I will be on time for work today. * Use a positive emotion in your statement. This excites me or I feel wonderful. Positive emotion strengthens the affirmation. * Phrase affirmation statements as facts instead of a wish. Complete your statement as if the goal has already been attained. Your mind believes mental messages and works to make them a reality even if they are not right now. * State your affirmations at least 6-8 times during the day. Start by waking up with a positive thought, in the shower, brushing your teeth, driving to work, taking a lunch break, before going into a meeting, cooking dinner, getting ready for bed. There are literally hundreds of opportunities throughout the day when you can think of a quick affirmative thought. It is very important to start and end your daily with positive affirmations. It sets the tone for the day and closes the day with a positive thought. Repetition is the key to habit. Repetition enhances self confidence and stimulates your mind to help achieve your goals.

I cannot emphasize enough the power self talk and positive affirmation statements can have upon the quality of your life. They propel you towards your goals that you have identified and desire to accomplish. Even if you work hard every day, without goals, your life is without direction. It is like a ship without a rudder sailing aimlessly through the seas.

Use these powerful tools of positive talk and positive affirmation statements to help speed and direct you toward your dreams and desires.

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Mar 01 2008

Profile Image of Jack Cox
Jack Cox

Self Image and Beliefs

Filed under Law of Attraction

Before you can use The Law of Attraction, and all the other great tools I teach, to create every good thing you want in your life, you must be ready to accept all those good things.

For many of us this is the hardest part. How many times has somebody offered to help you, maybe offered to pay for a shared taxi or something, and you have said “Oh no, that’s alright, I’ll pay”. Well if you can’t accept a taxi fair from a friend, how are you ever going to accept the new life you want from the Universe?

This may be due to a deep seated belief you are probably not even conscious of. It probably goes something like this: “I am really not a very good person so I don’t deserve to have the things that I want. Remember that awful thing I did twenty years ago, I deserve to be punished not rewarded”.

Come on! That was a long time ago. You have grown and evolved since then. You would not do the same thing today. Make amends if you can, and if you can’t just forgive yourself anyway and move on. And remember, you would not be the kind, loving, wise being you are today had you not gone through that and learnt its lessons.

You may not be able to make amends with the people you hurt but what goes around comes around so you can make up for it by helping other people, the people who are in your life now, instead. And if ever you run into those earlier people again just say, “I am sorry, I know I hurt you but I was being the best person I knew how to be at the time. I know how to be a very much better person now and I am using that knowledge to help others”.

As I said, you may not be aware of any of this on the surface. Consciously you may think you are a pretty ok kind of person. However if you find your self talk saying things like “I could never have that” or “I could never stay in that hotel” or “I could never fly first class”, stop and ponder. Do you have an unworthy undercurrent running through your subconscious?

Self image is the way we see ourselves and how we feel about ourselves. It can be complex and multi-faceted. Its important to try and connect with our self image, to bring it into the open where we can work on it. At various times each day ask yourself “How do I feel about myself right now?” Really listen to the answer. For this exercise its important to really listen to the answer. Don’t instantly replace anything negative with a positive affirmation as any self respecting Law of Attraction practitioner normally would. Later but not yet. First listen to the message and it will reveal an undercurrent of false beliefs you never even knew exited.

You can also look in the mirror and ask yourself “How do I look to myself right now?” Yes its ok for the boys to do this as well as the girls. If asking this question makes you feel fat and ugly, skinny, hairy, bald, bloated, maybe you need to give yourself more love and affection, more nurturing. Yes it really is ok to love ourselves, indeed it is essential. We are not being conceited. In fact we cannot love anyone else, our family, friends, pet, the planet, until we first develop a healthy love for ourselves.

Once we have discovered our negative undercurrents we have started to replace them. Affirmations and creative visualisation are great tools to help us develop a healthy self love and a positive self image.

The reason our self image may not be accurate is that we have been brainwashed since birth to believe we are inadequate. Affirmations, creative visualisation and suggestion audio programmes are brainwashing too but now we are doing the brainwashing to ourselves, now we are fighting back.

Always try to think of your own better qualities and remind yourself of them often.

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